How do I stop thinking?

→ Do your thoughts sometimes run away with you?

→ Do you want more peace of mind, but don’t know how?

→ Do you mostly live in your head?

→ Do you worry a lot?

→ Do you think a lot about the past or the future?

If you find yourself thinking, “That’s me!” when reading any of these questions, then your thoughts are controlling you more often than you’d like.

What is reflection?

We all think, and that’s a natural part of our lives. Humans are mammals that are exceptionally good at this—and can even reflect on the act of thinking itself… “What was I just thinking, anyway?”

There’s nothing wrong with thinking, but it can get in our way—that’s what we call overthinking. We end up thinking about things all day long, or we base our decisions on every single pro and con we can come up with.

We can also worry, come up with scenarios, and go round and round in circles. All because, for example, we’re afraid of something or dreading something. Does it help us? Usually not at all! And yet we do it, because we’re used to it . And in the moment, it seems to give us more control over the situation. This helps our sympathetic nervous system calm down. Think of it as comforting yourself, patting yourself on the back, or telling yourself that everything will be okay. So we tend to come up with scenarios especially when we’re feeling stressed. To reassure ourselves, we start overthinking.

Stress from overthinking

At the same time, it’s also true that when we overthink things, we often end up feeling more stressed than when we don’t think so much. So it’s actually very healthy to think less and, for example, enjoy more moments of silence. But how do you do that?

The tips below can help you stop overthinking or even stop it altogether.

Did you find my article interesting and would you like to learn more? Then check out my training courses.

3 tips for stopping overthinking:

1. Be aware that thoughts come and go. You have the same arms, feet, and legs your whole life. But thoughts come and go all the time. That means we don’t need to attach too much significance to them. You can decide to think something else at any moment.
2. We are not our thoughts, but we do have them. Once you realize this, you’ll start to see your thoughts from a greater distance. You’ll identify with them less, which will help you arrive at smarter solutions or choices.
3. Take the online course: How Do I Stop Thinking? In this concise course, I’ll guide you—using personal examples, theory, and exercises—toward worrying less, planning less, thinking less about the future, and reflecting less on the past. I’ll also explain why we often think so much and which unhealthy or unhelpful thoughts you can let go of—and, of course, I’ll give you exercises on how to do this.

Does this article appeal to you? You might also want to check out the books by Discover Your Holy Grail. Are you curious about what we organize? Then sign up for one of our events.

My name is Rianne van Kuil, author of Discover Your Holy Grail – Your Hero’s Journey from Trauma to Healing, and a trauma and healing expert. I believe that complete healing from trauma is possible, and I guide people on that journey.

Photo: iStock